April 2020
Hello from Orlando!
For as long as I can remember, I’ve tried to fill the silence.
When I’d write my books, I’d listen to music to help inspire my writing.
When I’d drive to work, sixty miles a day, I’d listen to the sports station.
When I’d take a shower or go for a run, I’d listen to podcasts. Many, many podcasts.
Same thing when at the grocery store. And at the gym. And with just about anything.
And it wasn’t just with music, the radio, and podcasts. It was checking the news when I woke up instead of writing my books. It was checking Facebook while watching a show on TV. I wasted a lot of time filling the silence. But the biggest time suck was podcasts.
For the longest time, I chalked it up to being productive. To wanting to use every minute of every day to the fullest. Whether it was catching up on the news or learning how to be a better writer or learning how to advertise. Always be learning, I’d think, believing I was super productive and making good use of time. No harm in that. Right?
But that changed last week when I went for a walk and I forgot my phone at home.
I didn’t notice it at first. About ten minutes in, I realized something was off. I debated going back home for it. It doesn’t feel natural to not be listening and learning something. The silence was deafening and uncomfortable. I’d endured 10 minutes of it.
But instead of turning back, I kept going. And after a while, something happened.
I felt the early morning wind blowing through my street which I hadn’t noticed before.
I heard the sound of my shoes as I walked over the grit on the sidewalk. Birds chirped. Cars with loud engines motored by in the distance. Kids laughed in their yards, playing.
I was able to hear my own thoughts for a change and was finally able to figure out the best way to start my next novel, something I’d been struggling with for a very long time.
I’m sharing this with you because we’re in week six of quarantine. Day 46. And one thing I keep hearing over and over again is how we need to take advantage of the newfound downtime most of us have now and be productive. To learn something new.
And it is a great time to learn and work on new things, like a new story in my case.
But the answer isn’t always to keep trying to do more to be productive.
Sometimes we can do more by doing less. By turning off the constant noise in life and allowing ourselves to be bored for once. To go for a walk and just listen to the rhythm of our own breathing. To go for a drive and listen to the air rushing past as you move, not the radio. To learn by listening to your own thoughts instead of everybody else’s.
We all want to be better.
Better writers. Better parents. Better informed. Better connected. Better everything.
And the things we use to fill the silence aren’t bad.
But it doesn’t hurt to turn it all off and stop trying to be something and instead, just be.
Every once in a while, at least.
You might find the silence isn’t so bad after all. -Ken